"Is hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with a proof."
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
(gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is
compressed) or some variant.
One student, however wrote the following:
First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass.
If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So,
at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls
leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets
to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that
exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you
are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there
are more than one of these religions and people do not belong
to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls
go to hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states
that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to
stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay
constant.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will
increase until all hell breaks loose.
2. Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase
of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop
until hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Therese
Banyan during my Freshman year, 'That it will be a cold
night in Hell before I sleep with you', and take into account the fact
that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with
her, then 2 cannot be true, and so Hell is exothermic." This student
got the only A.